Understanding Relapse Before It Happens

Lesson 1

What Relapse Really Is (and Isn’t)

Relapse is not a single moment of using again. It is a process that begins long before a drink, drug, or destructive behavior ever appears. Understanding this process gives you power, clarity, and the ability to interrupt relapse before it gains momentum.

Three Stages of Relapse

• Emotional Relapse — You’re not thinking about using, but your emotions and behaviors are drifting toward danger.
• Mental Relapse — A battle begins in your mind: part of you wants to stay sober, part of you wants escape.
• Physical Relapse — The actual act of using again.

Most people try to “fix” relapse at the physical stage — but by then, the battle is already lost. Recovery becomes stronger when you learn to recognize the early signs and respond quickly.

Lesson 2

Relapse as a Process, Not a Failure

Seeing relapse only as a moral failure keeps you stuck in shame. Seeing it as a process helps you learn from it. Every step in the process is a chance to turn around, reach out, and choose a different path.

Why Language Matters

• “I blew it” keeps you stuck in guilt.
• “Something went wrong in my process” invites curiosity and growth.
• “What can I learn?” is more powerful than “What’s wrong with me?”

When you change how you talk about relapse, you change how you respond to it.

Lesson 3

Relapse, Shame, and Identity

Shame says, “I am my worst mistake.” Grace says, “I am more than my worst day.” If you believe relapse defines your identity, you are more likely to give up. If you believe God still calls you His child, you are more likely to stand back up.

Identity Statements

• I am not my addiction.
• I am not my relapse.
• I am a person in process, loved by God.

Emotional Relapse: Catching the First Signs

Lesson 4

Emotional Warning Signs

Emotional relapse begins quietly. You’re not thinking about using — but you’re drifting toward the conditions that make relapse likely.

Common Emotional Warning Signs

• Isolation
• Not asking for help
• Poor sleep or appetite
• Anger, irritability, or anxiety
• Skipping meetings or spiritual practices
• Overworking or staying “too busy”

Lesson 5

Stress, Exhaustion, and Burnout

Stress and exhaustion wear down your defenses. When you are tired, hungry, or overwhelmed, your ability to make wise choices decreases. Many relapses begin with simple neglect of basic self-care.

HALT: A Simple Check-In

• H — Hungry
• A — Angry
• L — Lonely
• T — Tired

When you notice any of these, it’s time to pause and care for yourself instead of pushing harder.

Lesson 6

Emotional Honesty vs. Emotional Numbing

Many people in addiction learned to numb emotions instead of feeling them. In recovery, emotional honesty is a new skill. Naming what you feel is not weakness; it is wisdom.

Healthy Emotional Practices

• Journaling your feelings without judgment
• Talking honestly with a safe person
• Bringing your emotions to God in prayer

Mental Relapse: The Battle in the Mind

Lesson 7

Thoughts, Cravings, and the “Old Story”

Mental relapse is the inner tug-of-war between the desire to stay sober and the desire to escape. You may start remembering “the good times,” minimizing the consequences, or imagining that you can control it this time.

Lesson 8

Bargaining and Justifying

Bargaining thoughts sound like: “Just one time,” “Just on weekends,” or “I deserve a break.” Justifying sounds like: “I’ve been good,” “No one will know,” or “I can handle it now.” These thoughts are mental relapse in action.

Countering Bargaining

• Remember the full story, not just the “good parts.”
• Say the truth out loud to someone safe.
• Use written reminders of past consequences.

Lesson 9

Taking Thoughts Captive

Scripture invites us to “take every thought captive.” That means noticing your thoughts, testing them against truth, and choosing what to agree with. You are not powerless over your thoughts when you bring them into the light.

Physical Relapse: Stopping the Slide

Lesson 10

The Last Step in the Chain

Physical relapse is the moment you pick up again. By this point, emotional and mental relapse have usually been building for some time. The goal is to interrupt the process long before this stage.

Lesson 11

What Actually Happens Before You Use

Before physical relapse, there are usually patterns: certain people, places, times of day, or emotional states. Mapping these patterns helps you see that relapse is rarely random.

Questions to Ask

• Where was I?
• Who was I with?
• What was I feeling?
• What was I telling myself?

Lesson 12

Responding After a Slip

If you slip, the most important thing is what you do next. Do you hide and keep using, or do you reach out, tell the truth, and get back on track? A slip does not have to become a full relapse.

Building a Daily Recovery Structure

Lesson 13

Routine, Rhythm, and Recovery

Relapse often grows in the cracks of an unstructured life. A daily recovery structure creates rhythm, stability, and predictability so that your emotions and thoughts have less room to spiral.

Lesson 14

Morning Practices that Anchor the Day

How you start your day matters. A simple morning routine can set your mind and heart in the right direction.

Examples

• Short prayer of surrender.
• Reading a devotional or Scripture.
• Writing 3 things you’re grateful for.

Lesson 15

Evening Review and Course Correction

Evening review helps you look back over the day with honesty and grace. You notice where you drifted and where you stayed grounded, and you bring it all to God.

Faith-Based Tools for Strength

Lesson 16

Drawing Strength from God

Recovery is not just about saying “no” to substances; it is about saying “yes” to a new source of strength. Faith invites you to rely on God’s power instead of your own willpower alone.

Lesson 17

Scripture, Prayer, and Worship in Temptation

In moments of temptation, you need quick, simple tools. Short prayers, memorized verses, and worship can shift your focus from the craving to the One who carries you.

Examples

• “God, help me right now.”
• Quoting a verse about freedom or strength.
• Playing a worship song that lifts your eyes.

Lesson 18

Faith and Failure

Faith does not mean you never struggle. It means you know where to run when you do. God is not surprised by your weakness; He invites you to bring it to Him.

Managing Triggers & High-Risk Situations

Lesson 19

Knowing Your Triggers

Triggers are people, places, things, emotions, or situations that increase the risk of relapse. Knowing your triggers is not about living in fear; it is about living with wisdom.

Lesson 20

Avoid, Adjust, or Accept

Not all triggers are handled the same way. Some can be avoided, some can be adjusted, and some must be accepted and managed.

Examples

• Avoid: Old using spots, certain parties.
• Adjust: Bring a sober friend, limit time, have an exit plan.
• Accept: Stress at work, family tension — manage with tools.

Lesson 21

Planning for High-Risk Events

Holidays, paydays, anniversaries, and family gatherings can all be high-risk. Planning ahead turns danger into opportunity for growth.

Creating a Personal Relapse Prevention Plan

Lesson 22

Your Personalized Safety Plan

A relapse prevention plan is a written, practical guide you create for yourself. It outlines what you will do when warning signs appear, who you will contact, and how you will stay grounded in your faith and recovery tools.

Lesson 23

People, Actions, and Truths

A strong plan includes three categories: people you will contact, actions you will take, and truths you will remember.

Examples

• People: sponsor, mentor, trusted friend.
• Actions: go to a meeting, leave a risky situation, pray, journal.
• Truths: Scriptures, identity statements, reminders of past consequences.

Lesson 24

Practicing the Plan Before You Need It

Plans only work if you practice them. Walking through your plan when you are calm makes it easier to use when you are stressed.

Accountability, Community & Family Support

Lesson 25

You Don’t Have to Do This Alone

Isolation is one of the most dangerous conditions for relapse. Accountability and community provide support, perspective, and encouragement when your own thinking becomes cloudy.

Lesson 26

Healthy vs. Unhealthy Accountability

Healthy accountability is based on love, honesty, and mutual respect. Unhealthy accountability is based on control, fear, or shame.

Healthy Accountability Looks Like:

• People who listen and tell you the truth.
• Relationships where you can be honest about cravings.
• Support that points you back to God and recovery tools.

Lesson 27

Family, Boundaries, and Healing

Family can be a source of support or stress. Boundaries help protect your recovery while still allowing for connection where it is safe.

Long-Term Recovery: Living a New Story

Lesson 28

From Surviving to Thriving

At first, recovery may feel like constant crisis management. Over time, as you practice these tools, you begin to move from merely avoiding relapse to building a new, meaningful life.

Lesson 29

Purpose, Service, and Calling

Long-term recovery is fueled by purpose. Serving others, sharing your story, and using your gifts give you reasons to stay sober beyond just avoiding pain.

Questions to Explore

• Who can benefit from what you’ve learned?
• What gifts or passions has God given you?
• How can your story bring hope to others?

Lesson 30

Continuing the Journey

Recovery is a lifelong journey, not a finish line. You will keep learning, growing, and adjusting. The tools in this course are meant to be used again and again as you walk with God and others.